Chasing Dreams by Deborah Raney

Author:Deborah Raney
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Kregel Publications
Published: 2019-12-16T16:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER 23

JOANNA WATCHED LUKE IN THE dim glow of the twinkle lights, waiting for his laughter that usually came so easily.

But it never came. Instead, he sighed deeply and rose to pace behind the chair where he’d been sitting. Finally he sat back down and looked her in the eye. “I don’t really know what to say, Joanna. Except that I’m really disappointed. In you. In … everything.”

In you. Those two words hurt more than she’d expected them to. And yet, she’d anticipated them. Even though she didn’t think it was wrong to hold out for what she’d dreamed of for marriage, the fact that Luke was sacrificing so much for a boy he wasn’t even related to made her feel like her own wishes were petty and self-centered. Were they?

A lump lodged in her throat and tears threatened. Humiliation washed through her. Not Luke’s intention, she knew. But that was exactly the emotion filling her now. She bent her head, struggling to compose herself.

“I’m sorry if I’ve disappointed you. But Luke …” She fought back tears. “Is it so wrong to want the things I’ve always dreamed about?”

“No. It’s not. And honestly, if you’re not willing to give up those dreams for what I have to offer, then I’m glad to know it now.” He scraped the toe of his shoe on the flagstone. “I guess I just wonder what happened to ‘I think you’re doing a wonderful thing’?”

She looked askance at him.

“That’s what you said to me the night of your sister’s wedding. About Mateo. I guess I hoped you’d be willing to … adjust your dreams a little if the guy was right. But obviously, I’m not Mr. Right.”

“It’s not you, Luke. It truly isn’t. If—” She stopped. She’d been about to say “if it wasn’t for Mateo.” But that wasn’t right. The boy was like a brother to Luke, and she knew her claws would be out if Luke dared criticize one of her sisters. “If things were different, I’d be … pursuing you. Hard.” She smiled, even as sadness overwhelmed her.

He didn’t return her smile. “I didn’t really need to hear that. And I sure don’t know how I’m supposed to respond to it.”

She felt chastened, deservedly so, perhaps, but she wanted to help him understand. “I only meant that someone else, someone who hasn’t held out all their lives for … certain things, will be able to accept things for what they are.” Even as she spoke the words, she felt a stone in her gut thinking of Luke with someone else. “I’m sorry. I’m not making sense, am I?”

He frowned. “Oh, you’re making perfect sense. I’m sorry I wasted your time.”

“Luke, I never said it was a waste of my time. And what you’re doing for Mateo is a wonderful thing. But I didn’t even know for sure what the situation with him was until tonight! You can’t blame me for that.”

He held up both hands to her, palms out. “I’m sorry. That wasn’t fair.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.